Hey! everyone..Merry Christmas to all of U,

May all ur dreams come true,

May this winter heralds the best spring of ur life,

May the world live in peace,

And Happiness stays with us forever,

Merry Christmas!!

Moments..!!

Life is about getting what we want. It's about the joy we want, it's about the happiness we want, about the smiles on our loved ones that we want. Life is all about what makes us happy, makes us full. makes our heart beat. Life is all about what we want. It's bright, sunny and beautiful. It's full of amazing people,  our family, our friends, all those who are the part of our life and makes life complete and worth living.
Life is like that beautiful ray of sunset, which won't last for long but we want to  make it last, knowing it's impossible but try our best. We sit in the sunshine, soaking in it, click the picture of that moment and make it stay forever in our memory. Life is worth living in the moment. No moment will stay for long so try to make the best memory of it coz life is beautiful and beauty won't remain same throughout it's own natural phases.
Life is beautiful. It is also like that rainy day, where we look at the rain from our window and wonder why the clouds are crying. Are these the tears of joy or the tears of sorrow. Like other moments, we savor it. Make a hot cup of coffee and taste it as that moment we know will also pass, just like the sunset.
It's the moments, that life is all about. We know they will pass and we keep a memory of it. Life is great and for a matter of fact it's beautiful. Loneliness may be seen by many as a depressing moment but it is also one of the moments to be cherished as it also won't last for long. Any moment, be it good or bad, won't stay for long. So try to live in the good moment and hope for the better in the bad one.
So at the end I would say to myself, life is fair and it will always be, no matter how many failures I have to go through, how many rejections I have to face, but in the end I will always have a smile on my face coz moments won't last longer and they will pass.
Ending my article with a quote  of mine:-

It's not about cherries on the chocolate pastry that would make a kid smile,

But it's the memories related to it that would make her smile,

Coz the moments pass quickly, But not the memories...!!

Behind these Bars..!

Story of a blue bird..(continued)

“Hi!” Tyra greeted Novak. “Didn’t you give it a shot today?” Novak said jokingly. “I thought that I should not waste time in my fruitless tries.” Tyra replied. Tyra couldn’t sleep last night as she was so excited to meet Novak again. There was something about him that she couldn’t resist. He was a mystery to her and she wanted to know him more. “So why you want to know what’s beyond the sky?” Novak asked her. “It’s just the curiosity.” Tyra replied. Novak knew the truth and asked her, “Is it solely your curiosity which had led you to fly in the sky throughout your life? Or is it something much deeper?” Tyra sensed the seriousness in Novak’s voice. She realised that Novak was not just a stranger but he knew her too well, but how? “Tell me what’s beyond the sky.” “Nothing, just an empty space.” Novak replied. “You won’t find the one you have been looking for, for so long there.” “Then where will I find the answers these voices haunt me with?” Tyra asked desperately. “Can you swim?” Novak asked jokingly. Tyra was getting angry now. “The one you are looking for can not be found outside. You have to swim inside yourself and find the answers. Close your eyes and feel yourself. You won’t feel empty” Novak said meeting Tyra’s gaze. “It’s tough but you can do it.” “I don’t understand.” Tyra looked confusing. To her nothing of this made sense. Novak had feared this as she was just a bird. But he had planted the seed. “You talk rubbish. I should have never listened to you. You are wrong about the sky. You don’t have wings like me so you can’t fly and know what’s beyond the sky” Tyra said angrily. She was disappointed. She had come with hope and now Novak was nothing but someone who was crazier than her. She flew away. Novak knew that this would happen. He felt sad but he knew that Tyra would have a better life now.
Weather suddenly changed. It seemed like universe was also angry. The clear blue sky soon got filled with dark grey clouds. Wind started blowing much faster. Tyra didn’t notice any of this as she was filled with anger and her eyes were full of tears. Her society had made fun of her, called her crazy but none of it hurt her. But today was different. The person she thought knew her and shared her dream had made a fool of her feelings. Thundering had started and she should soon get back home. But Tyra’s judgement was clouded by her anger. She had never been hurt so much before. “I will show you what’s beyond the sky Novak. I am no fool like you think. You can’t fly but I can and I will find out. I don’t need anybody’s help. Every one is a fake. ” Tyra said out loud and flew up with all her strength. She was not going back home. She was going up, up in the sky to find out the truth. The wind had grown more fierce, throwing Tyra here and there in the sky. But Tyra was more determined and kept flying. Fierce wind soon turned into a deadly storm. There was no bird in the sky as it was deadly to be there in the sky. Sky had turned into a deathly trap for all those who found their freedom in it. It had started raining, but Tyra wasn’t going to give up. For her, death was more peaceful. The best way she had planned for her to die was while fighting for her dream and today seemed the perfect way to say goodbye to her life. It was raining and thundering, storm was raging hitting Tyra so hard that her wings were helpless to balance her. As she falls from the sky, she closed her eyes and it was Novak she thought about. With her eyes closed, waiting for death to come, she could feel something inside her. She was swimming, swimming inside her. But it was short and she hit the ground. It seemed like universe had heard her conversation with her grandmother about life and death and gave her the death, the way she had wanted, dying while fighting for her dream.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Diary..Will u listen the story of a Bird?

Dear diary,
Something is going inside me. A wind is blowing and it is taking me with it to different places but like every other dust particle caught up in it, I am also rotating and am in a state where I seek for stability. Dear diary, what is life? Is it a word which means to survive or is it a word which has deeper meaning like having a life in itself. Dear diary,the world is coming to a fatal end and I haven’t yet caught the glimpse of who I am. It’s like being in an ocean and yet not seen the reflection of yourself in it.

Dear diary, will u listen a story of a Blue Bird? 
Her name was Tyra and she was a beautiful blue bird with feathers so soft that she was called a soft candy. She was very pretty and fly in the open sky. She loved the sky so much that she never come up the ground until her wings start hurting. She was a passionate bird having the curiosity of reaching to the topmost level of the sky. For her, life was like a gift and she never wanted to waste it. She used to think that if nature has given her wings then why not she try to find out her creator who is somewhere behind the sky. All the friends of Tyra were more of usual chaps who were more spirited for winning the challenges which were put by the society. For them life was a circle encompassing their family, society and their friends. Tyra was just the opposite of what others were. She never liked her society as she found them and their rules mere subjected to their thinking and ease. She never understood the rituals, the curses. All she was curious about was the mystery behind the sky. Throughout her life she kept on trying to find out what was behind the sky until she met Novak. Novak was the person who saw in Tyra the zeal and the determination to be free. He had known Tyra long before they had even met.
Novak was a farmer ad he used to work on the corn field of his father. He was a simple human being who lived his life in peace as he knew the secret behind the sky. One day while Tyra had exhausted her wings by flying for several hours in search of reaching to the top of the sky, the winds had blown her towards the country side. She was resting on the head of a scarecrow when Novak saw her. He knew her the moment he saw her and offered her the water. Tyra exhausted by her effortless tries drank the water and said the man thank you and flew away. Novak saidw elcome and went back to do his work. He was smiling as he knew she would come again.
The next day Tyra was again sitting on the head of the scarecrow when Novak came and offered her water. Tyra was curious to know why the man always bring water for her, as she knew one thing about humans that they will always approach towards the birds with a word, ‘shoo’ on their tongue. She said thank you and couldn’t stop herself from asking that why he was acting unlike the other humans and shoo her away. “Who are you?” Tyra asked curiously. “I am Novak” Novak replied smilingly. “I am a farmer and I work here”. “Why you give me water every time I come here?” Tyra after all asked the question which was bothering her. Novak had known that she would ask this and said smilingly, “Did you found out what’s beyond the sky?” Tyra was shocked by the question which Novak had asked and with a moment of annoyance filled with curiosity, she asked him how he knew.
Novak had seen beyond the beautiful feathery skin of hers, the soul which denied remembering him but he did. “Just guessed”, Novak said jokingly. Tyra wasn’t satisfied with the answer but couldn’t argue with him as it was growing darker and she had to head back home. She thanked for the water and flew away.
That night it was raining and while Tyra was in her nest trying to sleep, her thoughts were consumed by the question, “Did u found what’s beyond the sky?” which Novak had asked her. She was annoyed with him as she could sense the mockery in his question. Everyone to whom Tyra have told her deepest desire of knowing what is beyond the sky, have made fun of her. Even the closest friend of Tyra, though not much closer, thinks of her as a crazy blue bird.
...................To Be Comtinued

'Dear Diary'

Don't know how many of you are reading my blog but as my father says that never concern yourself with the number and keep on writing coz someday it will be read. So here I am again with an article about my life.
To the outside world, my life may seem to be perfect and yeah, logically thinking, my life is perfect with a perfect combination of every thing one desires in his or her life. I have great friends who are there with me when I need them, in my happiness as well as in my sadness. I have a wonderful, supporting family. I am an engineering student and will be a graduate next year and talking about being perfect I will have job in my hand once I am a graduate. What else one need to call his or her life perfect!

But still here I am writing about my life as it is still incomplete, still it feels like something is missing and my life is not perfect. There's  no happiness among these complete things and still I find myself searching for something I do not know. All my well wishers are proud of me and all my enemies are jealous of me but here I am still not knowing what am I missing.
Life has always been a mystery for me and I have always believed that time is the only one that can solve this mystery. My patience is wearing out and now people can see behind the mask of happiness and fulfillment, the vulnerable me, the empty me.
I wrote this article coz I know not many people visit my blog so I can still refer to it as my 'Dear Diary'.

EMPTINESS...!

I write about something I feel inside,

I write about, emptiness,

I pretend to be interested in the work am doing,

I pretend to be, fine,

I write about something I feel inside,

I write about emptiness,

They find my life so charming, 

That they can not see this rootless tree,

They are so engrossed in the my outer charms,

That they forget the real me,

The work I do, I get so much praise,

But it do not touch my heart,

They call me so lucky, so complete,

But am still hanging in the middle of nowhere,

I write about something I feel inside,

I write about emptiness....

The setting sun, the coming darkness..

As this sunshine fades away,
The sun sets and the night comes,
I woke up from a dream,
A dream that felt so real,
A dream where I was shining like a golden bird,
Whatever I wished for, I got,
Whatever I worked for, it happened,
But it was a dream,
I came to know when I woke up,

The sun rays are changing their course,
As the sun is setting, they too are are fading,
But with the coming darkness,
I still got the stars and the moon to look forward to,

Setting sun has its own beauty,
Unlike the rising sun,
It's rays are more nostalgic,
It reminds me of my childhood,
Which faded with the setting sun,,
It reminds me about the present moment,
Which will fade with this setting sun,

But with the coming darkness,
I still got  the stars and the moon to look forward to...!!

Found..!!

Last night I made a decision,
To seek a reason for all my pain,
I wandered around the world,
I wandered to every place,

Reasons that what I wanted,
Answers to all those why,
Why I've been so sad,
Why I've been so lonely,

So much pain inside,
So much pain outside, why
So many people around me,
So many friends around me, but why,

Why I'm still so sad,
Why I'm still so lonely,

I went to a place where I can feel solace,
It was calm and beautiful,
I've never seen such a beauty,
Got all my answers of why,
Reasons for which I've wandered so long,

All my loneliness,
All my emptiness fone,
At last I found a place,
Where I can be so happy,

I'm so sorry,
For all those times,
Blaming you for all my pain,

Probelems were not putside me,
Reasons were not outside me,
Now i know,
It's all inside me,
Love, Happiness, Peace,

U have no power to hurt me,
U have no power to break me,
Coz it's not U who rules,
But it's me, Master of My Life,

Found the reasons,
Found all those answers of why,
Life is a miracle,
It's not outside, but inside me,

At last, found that place inside,
Found that place for which I wandered outside,
I'm so sorry,
For blaming you all the time,

At last, found that place inside,
Found that place for which I wandered outside...!

I'll take a flight

When the day sets,
I settle down with my wings,
Coz tomorrow will come,
And I'll take a flight,

In the open sky,
Where the sun is shining bright,
And the birds are chirping,
And the clouds are swimming,
In the open sky,

I'm walking on the road,
Which takes me to my destiny,
As they call, My destiny,
I keep miving, and keep looking around me,
Coz life has so much to show,

Some call it madness, some call it bad luck,
But unlike them, I call it living,
With every strike, my wings grow,
 With every breath, they strive for freedom,
As the day passes they keep growing,
Coz tomorrow will come,

And i'll take a flight....

Wish U were real..!

Sometimes I wish miracles were true,
They could be easily done,
Sometimes I wish u were real,
N come to heal my pain,
Sometimes I wish I was not alone,
That u were real and would give me ur shoulder to cry,
Sometimes I wish that u were real...

There are times when darkness surrounds,
The streets are empty,
and m walking alone,
On the road that keeps heading nowhere,
Sometimes I wish miracles were true,
And they could easily be done,
Sometimes i wish I wasn't alone,
That u were real,
That the magic I wish for,
U n me will create,
That I was not alone,
Yeah seroiusly I wish
That miracles were true,
That u were real

And i wasn't alone...!!

Life u are stupid...!!

Life you are stupid,
U dont listen to me,
When I want someone,
U giv me loneliness,
When I want to cry,
U take away my tears,
Life you are very rude...
I don't know how you can do this,
But every time I look back at the things u've done,
I see the irony in my thoughts and actions,
My thoughts still revolves around telling u,
That u are stupid, rude and cold,
But my actions now adjust with the friend u gave,
Loneliness, yeah, definately my friend,
And moreover I see myself stronger than the rest,
When they cry, I smile,
Coz u took away my tears long time ago,
Life u are stupid,
U dont listen to me properly,
But maybe this is what I'm supposed to be,
I dont blame u but still u are stupid,
Maybe u will know it,
Maybe someone will love u too,
Maybe then u will realize it,
That life u are stupid...!!

Different shades of life...

Life is beauty,
Life is creation,
It comes in different colours,
In different shades...

It's time to move on..!

Every night I go to sleep,
A tear roll down from my eyes,
I don't know why my eyes are wet,
Maybe it's your absence they have felt,

Every night I go to sleep,
A tear roll down from my eyes,

So many years have passed,
And I've missed your presence,
Every person I used to look at,
I could see your reflection,
But what a fool I was,
My tears tells me now,

You were never meant for me,
Maybe you belonged to someone else,
But how could I know,
Coz my heart beated for you once,

Every night I go to sleep,
A tear roll down from my eyes,
I don't know why my eyes are wet,
Maybe it's your absence they have felt,

It's now time to tell my heart,
There is someone better for me,
He's waiting since I was born,
As he was born for me,

It's time to tell my heart,
Not everyone is lucky to meet the one,
Their heart skipped the beat once,

It's time to tell my heart,
To move on,
Life is enough to meet the right one,
It's time to move on...!!!

It's all over

Last night I kept waiting for you,
Last night I kept waiting for you,
U never told me that,
U were planning on me,
Leaving me all alone
Saying it's all over..
Last night I kept waiting for you,
I had a dream,
In my dream u were there,
Holding me close, in ur strong arms
If I have fall from the sky,
U will be there to catch me,
If I'll land on the thorns
U will be there to lay with me,
I had a dream,
In that dream u were true,
Unlike now, Planning on me
Killing me now, with ur soft lies,
Leaving me now by my side, all alone
Like a rock in the desert that what u have left me instead,
I had a dream,
In my dream I was alone,
Holding my heart, u played once,
Robbed by your touch, by ur words....
Last night I kept waiting for you,....

You are Special..!!

Gifts!! We all want to be blessed with some special gifts which will make us unique and different from the crowd. Yeah we all want it. It's a fight between self dignity and and our own self being. How many of us have thought atleast once in our life that, we have been bestowed with a special gift which make us different form our friends and people we meet in our everyday life ? I know we all have dreamt of being special in our own ways. Well till now if you have shed that feeling of being special coz now you think you are grown up and matured unlike the childish you, who used to think of being special every single day then it's time to renew your thinking about yourself.
Yes, I am old enough to be called matured and is perfectly tuned to the real world where I work to live my life in a way I want it to be, where I dream of being with a perfect man like any other women of my age would but still I haven't stopped myself from thinking that I'm special. I am special, I've a gift that makes me distinguished from the crowd, I have that  gift in me that I used to dream of when I was a kid. Don't call me immature coz it sounds like a childish thing!

Tell me, "What it feels like when you have a gift and you don't know how to use it, as you are unaware of it?" Will that gift counts as a gift? No, we won't count that as a gift because how can we count something as a gift which is of no use to us.
Imagine that you are running in the woods searching for your gift coz someone like me inspired you to search for your gift. You are running and running, looking around yourself searching for the gift. But do you really know, "what that gift looks like?", "what actually is that gift you are searching?" Most of us don't know it. So even if we come across our gift, we won't be able to recognize it and will keep searching for it here and there.
We know that we have a gift that makes us special and different form the rest but how to know that gift and use it to it's maximum potential?
The answer to the problem is setting yourself free and flow with the momentum around you. When you are running in the woods searching for your gift then set yourself  feelings free and and you will be directed towards your gift by the momentum of your will to find the gift. It sounds philosophical but there is no other way I can explain. It's like the universal law of attraction. When you truly want something then set your intentions clear and let yourself loose and the universe will guide you to your fate.
So the anthem is to let yourself free and flow.

Once you are near your gift it will make those childish fantasy true and for sure you will feel special as you too have a gift.

What happens when life becomes monotonous?

What happens when life becomes monotonous ? Do you enter into your grave and stay their waiting for life to switch to it's happening phase? Or you walk down the streets and try to do different stuff you never thought of doing as they did not fit to your schedule. What do you do when life becomes boring ??

I have this state almost every few weeks of a month, as a matter of fact there are only 4 weeks in a month. So out of 4 weeks, in 2 weeks life is pretty good and everything seems fresh, new ideas coming in and whatever task I've started seems to be working perfectly. It's like a bright sunshine I'm walking on. But what happens after those two weeks pass. Just like everytime I'm left with a question, "What should I do to get back the happening phase of my life which just passed away ?"
When life becomes monotonous , things seems to be enjoyed once, becomes boring, the things we found solace in becomes a complete no - no. Why does this boring phase comes in our life? Why can't we simply be in a phase where we keep on doing the things we love.
Suffering from monotonous days is not a new thing for me. But coping from it and starting over with life again is difficult. As a persistant victim of these monotonous days I have found two ways in which I can take my life as and turn it all over again. For some days I try to stay alone but inside my mind, I stay in my coffin. And when I'm over with the thought of being dead I try to open myself to new adventures which I may not be doing if I wasn't forced to enter into these monotonous days. Trying out new things doesn't mean going on a complete new adventure but rather trying new things with your work you used to love before entering into these monotonous days, because starting anything new within these days will demand lot of energy which our energy reservoir won't be agreeing with, so doing something different in the old work may help in beating these monotonous days.

For the last week I've been suffering from these monotonous days and when I was done with staying in my grave I thought of trying out this new trick of taking new adventures and adding new things to the work I usually do. However there are lot of things I have not started which I used to do before entering these days but now I don't have mood for them, so cannot start with new things in them. I love composing music on my guitar. I don't do it regularly but only when I'm in mood of making a new piece. I also like writing poems and articles, they are like a medium of communicating with myself and with the ones reading them. But when I enter into these monotonous days I simply leaves everything I love to do and my first reaction is entering into my grave like a coward. Yeah, it's not a brave act one do while facing something hostile. But I'm not  a full blown coward, I try to come back to all these things I loved, but sitting on the computer and trying to write something becomes so tough that the thoughts I have can not find the write words. So many times I have sat to write but end up in shutting the PC. The same thing happens with music, thoughts just dries up, creativity vanishes and all I'm left with is monotonous days haunting over me, not knowing when they goona leave.

But this time I've tried something new, the second option in the list, that is trying out different stuff  I never thought I would be doing. This time I set my thoughts free, and let my hands write whatever my mind have to say not thinking that whether it will be grammatically correct or meaningless. I set myself free and let my fingers play on the  tunes of my thoughts without judging , how is it sounding or will someone like it. I think I have found the solution to overcome these monotonous days which makes our life hell and cut us apart form it. Well while writing this article I have set my thoughts free and let my fingers connect directly with my thought and hey look, I have wriiten so much after a very long time. It feels good when you overcome something you thought was more powerful. The main thing I learned is that what is more important before accomplishing a goal is, settiing our sprits free and let them show their magic, that's why Life is called a  MAGIC WAND!! 

Waiting..!!

All these years I’ve been waiting 4 u,

N now I'm still waiting,

I have a question for u,

Are u too waiting,


As u can see my baby, its getting harder,

Day by day the heat is scorching,

And the things around us, are going drier,

The pool of love is shrinking..


Every now n then rainy clouds come,

Giving me a hope ,

That their might be a sign of me, in ur heart n soul,

But they just thunders n lighten the sky,

Leaving with the storm that follows,

And leaves my heart dried

And crying for you, that may never come...


All these years I’ve been waiting 4 u,

N now I'm still waiting,

I don't know, how long may it take,

To take you out of my heart,


As u can see my baby, its getting harder,

Day by day the heat is scorching,

N the things around us are going drier,

The pool of luv is shrinking....

                    "All these years I've been waiting for you, N now m still waiting"

22 years of existence..!

Life has been good, sometimes great and sometimes challenging. But all I can recall in these 22 years of journey that I'm still sailing on a boat which is being sailed by the winds of change.
Everytime when life changes it's course I keep resisting coz I am not that much spontaneous. But this time, after so many years I have thought to take a chance and trust these winds, at last they say that there is a reson behind every occurence. I do not know whether I will be able to accept these changes with arms wide open or like everytime, I will turn my back and run so fast that they can not catch me.

"It's hard to break those walls which one created to protect oneself from the pain and torture of estranged relationships.."

Capturing the Beauty

                    "As I walk on the sunshine, I capture thy beauty with my camera"

Light with in me..

Silence pleases me,
Darkness embraces me,
It's not that I've lost hope,
That I've given up,
Rather in darkness now i find meaning,
Meaning that light deludes...

Ever given a thought about what I want,
Taken time to see my reflection closely,
I would still be knowing the reason behind my smile,
Which fades so quickly like it comes...

Even as the time passes by,
And the night at its darkest phase,
I still walk on the path I'm destined for,
Closing my eyes, to see the light with in me....!!!

My BeSt FrieNd

Good or bad, how can I tell,
What your presence in my life tells.
You are like a kind heart,
Full of patience, you want me to seek,
I like when you say, have faith,
I like when you smile at my every stupid thought,
You are like a gentle breeze,
I miss it when it's gone,
My heart thumps when I sense your presence,
My body trembles not with shiver,
But with the excited pleasure,
You give me your every moment,
How much silly my needs may be,
All you have for me is your presence, your time,
I thank you for your existence in my life,
No matter how much I may close my walls on you,
But you still be standing behind them,
Waiting for me to open it again at the time of my need,
You are like my own soul,
Who knows me perfectly,
And never tries ot take my fake anger as real,
You are that best freind,
The world can never give me,
Coz such precious gifts are meant to be
            Secrets of Life !!!

FATE...!

Happenings are the strategies of life to teach you,
That every occurence has a fate,
Fate of you, and of those influenced by you.
Never worry about fate they bring to you,
Coz that fate will also have a reason!

Patience, Determination, Persistance,
This is all you require to understand,
That fate which is brought on you,
The day you will realize it,
That day you will see the magic of that fate,
The magic in your hands!!

.....!

Give up, no that's not me,

Try again, but how many times ,

Tired of life, u will never know,

In need of someone, No, in search of That ONE!!!

New life..

The forest seems to be so silent,
Like life has come to a stop,
The trees stand so tall,
But even their presence do not fill this hall,

The forest seems to be so calm,
Like life has come to a stop..

Where are the birds,
They were never so quite before,
Where are the butterflies,
Hovering the flowers for its nectar,
Today everything seems to be left stranded,
Depicting the situation of my crippled life,

The forest seems to be so silent,
Like life has come to a stop...

The sky has changed its colour,
Like the world changes its,
Everytime I want to be listened,
Like the sky, the world turns grey,

The forest seems to be so calm,
Like life has come to a stop..

But is this really the end of life,
Or the begining of an uncontrollable storm,
Maybe the birds left in search of a new life,
Maybe the butterflies will be hovering someother place,
Where life will be flourishing,
Leaving this perished forest,
Everyone left in search of new life,

The forest seems to be so silent,
Maybe I should also leave,
Searching for a place,
Where LIFE WOULDN'T HAVE STOPPED.....

My song "In the ocean of my eyes"

In the Ocean of my Eyes..

In the ocean of my eyes,
the world seems to fall so fast,
It's not with the reality I see,
Rather with the illusion I pretend to be in...


In the ocean of my eyes,
The world seems to fall so fast...


I can avoid the doom of the world and of me,
I can avoid all the troubles, that are surrounded around me,
All I have to do is, let the water settle,
All I have to do is, let the ocean calm in my eyes...


In the ocean of my eyes,
The world seems to fall so fast..


Time is not the count anymore,
As even this hour seems to be forever,
I sit on the chair, holding the pen,
Writing on the sand, the story of my life,
The tide rises so high, making the words wash away,
In the OCEAN OF MY EYES......

"Words may speak whats on the mind, but eyes speak the heart out..."

Fearless Warrior

Warriors marching towards the battle field,
Crowd gathers to cheer them,
Coz all know it will be the battle of death,
The battle with no survivors,
I wonder, will I be the same,
Or life will be like these people,
Saluting the fearless warriors!!


Everyday I have wondered what it will be to become a fighter. How it'll be to fight every bad thing, every unwanted thing and remove it out of my life. Everyday I have wondered what it'll be like, to be saluted by the crowd and worshipped as a fearless warrior. I spend my whole childhood dreaming about learning the art of fighting. I wanted to learn martial arts, judo and various fearless art of fighting. I was so amused by the thought of becoming a fearless warrior that I even wanted to become a great assassin who will remove the bad blood from her bullets and make this planet a better place.
But what I forgot to see, which the whole crowd could see in those warriors was, their fearless soul.
I am not an assassin, neither I know how to shoot nor I know how to do marshall arts. I have no knowlegde of fighting like those warriors. But still I feel like a warrior, fighting every struggle, fighting every challenge which life gives and the world watches. There is no need to have a gun with us to become a warrior. What matters the most is the state of mind we are captivated in. If we are able to break free ourselve from our own created prison then the thing which remains with us, will be the true warrior spirit. We all fight for something in our life. We fight for those things which are important to us. We all fight for our dreams, our love and our freedom. But what in us fights for us. I know it's a tricky sentence to understand but it will become clear only when we allow ourself to settle like a calm water and then ask ourself, what actually are we fighting for. Then you may understand the meaning of that tricky sentence. The answer will be the reflection in the calm water. And once you know it, then the warrior which will be fighting for it will be the fearless warrior.

Things seems same these days, life has given me a challenge and I have accepted it like everytime and is fighting it while the world watches me go down with my unending struggles, shouting at me to quit like their everyday business. But unlike the other times, there is a crowd which has gathered here to cheer me up. As I fall another time it still cheers for me as it knows that the battle I'm fighting will end up with death or what I call it as the completion of my purpose. They know I won't be anymore alive after this but their soul will bend for me, saluting the fearless warrior.

"Let the fearless warrior inside thou release the arrow from thy bow and hit the bulls eye"

ACCEPTANCE

From the morning till the night, I burn in this fire of wanting u,
I need u, i want u, coz i noe,
Everything will be bright with u by my side,
Bt still I keep burnin,coz all I lack is ACCEPTANCE!!


How many of us keep burning inside with the guilt of neglecting the bright sunshine which is just a step away from us, all we need is to push aside the curtains and let our life be filled with bright sunshine. It's not that we do not want it. We want it, need it badly in our life and we also know that it's the only way through which all our problems will end and life will become a magic wand and we the magician. Everything we do, reminds us about that sunshine which is behind the curtains. We feel like yelling out out loud or stop our heart coz every heart beat yearns for that sunshine which we can get but do not do anything to get it. But still days passes and those yearning stays inside but still we donot push aside the curtains and let the sunshine fill our lives. Why does it happens? How can this happen that when we want something so badly, which is in our reach also but still we do not take any steps to get it?
Maybe, we lack in one thing, without which every wants and needs of that thing becomes useless.
Acceptance is that thing which creates the difference. Till we do not accept the thing we want, we can never get it. Accepting the sunshine in your life is the first thing which will lead us to pushing the curtains aside and welcome the accepted thing in our lives. Even love needs acceptance. Loving someone unconditionally but never accepting it will lead to yearnings which will burn you to ashes but not into gold.
The whole universe works on the magic of acceptance. Once you accept it, that thing will start coming to you in reality coz you will start working for it. So the things we want in life must be accepted first.

        "The things that are accepted are the ones who's miracles the world witness"

Burning Passion

I want to become topper of the class,
I want to receive an award for it,
Coz this is my passion,
Or IS IT!!

How many of us have really doubted our dreams and passions, have questioned that, "Are the passions I'm talking about are really mine or the outcome of the things which are forced on me?". Life is an interesting journey. Since from childhood we build so many castles in our small imaginary world, beleiving that someday we will live in it. But as we grow, we realize that life is not only a bed of roses, it has thorns too, walking on which can be lot more painful and full of miseries. Looking at the thorns, the bed of roses becomes the myth and we drift away in a world which provides us with an inbuilt identity like of an engineer, or a doctor, or anything, walking on which is not much harder than on thorns. This world give us all that we want to complete our journey of life, money, family, materialistic desires but in return it takes that one thing which we were born or gifted with, our identity. Most of us are ready to sacrifice our identity, our gift in order to satisfy our family demands and to make everyone else happy who have no idea what real happiness means coz they also made this choice.
But how much we may try to become someone else, we never see our heart happy. It shouts and tell us everytime that the sacrifice we made was a coward thing, that we are nothing but the cowards who fears pain, struggles, miseries, who think that life as a bed of roses is only a myth coz we fear to face the struggles to reach it. Seems like our heart is right, we are cowards, always searching for excuses and trying to suppress our guilt by filling our hearts with the delusion that the passion which leads to the path of thorns is not the burning passion, rather this passion created by the burdens is the burning passion, the easy way out.

Life give us oppurtunities to take our identity back form the world and fullfil our purpose and cherish our gift, so lets not sell ourselves in this superfical world.

WE LIVE LIFE ONCE, SO IF CANNOT LIVE IT LIKE A KING THEN LETS DIE LIKE A WARRIOR!!

Perception

Not everything seems to be different,
Things are still lying at the same place as yesterday,
People are still coming n going as yesterday,
Nothing has changed from yesterday,
But still the world looks different from yesterday!

How many times have we seen such a difference in our lives, just by changing our way of thinking, life seems to be so changed and alive. This is the power of perception. The way we look at things, understand them, that's the way our life becomes. Few days back, I was bit depressed from life and everything seemed to be so gloomy and hopeless. I was driving with my father at night in a busy market area where people from all classes were busy buying their groceries. My father parked the car to buy some grocery. I wanted to stay in the car as I was not feeling happy, maybe facing my low mood swing.
As he went I sat inside the car and started observing people as i usually do. Many were heading for their homes and some young fellows came out with their freinds to hang out. It was a busy street, but still I felt insecure in the car. The world around me seemed to be so shallow, filled with bad people. It seemed like hopeless and filled with darkness. To me the world surely was at it's worst at that point. I waited for my father to come back and when he came back nothing changed at all, world was still at it's worst at that point.
Today, I was in that same place with my father and nothing had changed. People were still busy with their lives, some coming back from their jobs, some hanging out with their friends. World was same as it was few days back, but i did not feel insecure and world did not appear to be hopeless and meaningless. In every eyes their were dreams I could see, every person has his/her destination and everyone was trying to live their lives in their own way, world seemed different today, though nothing has changed from yesterday.
Their was surely a difference, not in the world but within me. Today I was happy and my mood was uplifted, everything seemed to me as hopeful and it felt like there is still love and compassion in this world. Surely, a good mood can change one's perception in a positive way.
So what I learned from my experience was that nothing is bad or good, deep or shallow, hopeful or hopeless, it's all in the way we look at things, the way we percieve them. If being in a good mood can make you look at life positively then everything in life becomes beautiful though nothing changed from yesterday, only our perception changed!
       

       " Always be in a good mood as it makes you look at life in a positive way!!"

Highs n Lows

Creativity comes from the heart,
N Things of heart never preish with time,
They perish when heart stops feeling about it!

Lot of us faces the highs n lows in our creativity. Sometimes its easy to express ourself through our creativity and sometimes its just a feeling of losing it. The things we build through our creativity just breaks into million pieces and we do not remember which piece fits where. This is all due to the rise and fall of our emotions. If one just becomes the slave of it then life is like a roller coaster ride.
As the life moves on it will show the intensity of our every emotion, be it of  fear, love, happiness or disappointment. It will show that life is not stagnant  and its like an ocean and every emotion in it is like a tide with its rise and fall. Confessing about myself, then i'm the slave of my emotions. When they are high and rising, i rise with them and life seems to be beautiful, full of hope and every event is turned into a milestone. But  when they are falling, i fall with them, without even realising that this fall will bring the darkness of life, a pain which even hundred needles can not give and peace which is brought by numbness of the senses.

Becoming the slave is not a good idea, though it has great thing to offer when its rising but it can nearly ruin ones life during its fall. I wish i could break free and the only hope which never changes through fall and rise, is the hope of  becoming the master of my emotions rather than a slave.

 The desert never said, it was thirsty of water,

 It was us, who saw it that way,

 But life still flourishes in it,

It’s all in the perception,

The way we look at things,

 No one is born with disabilities,

All it takes is courage n faith, To nourish the life inside ourself !! 

"Never try to catch a butterfly, let the fragrance of your personality make it drift towards you"

Life a Magic Wand n I'm the Magician

Somewhere down the memory lane I can still hear those voices,

Which used to tell me how life is a magic wand and I am the magician,

How the world can be made to bend on its knees in front of me,

How everything in front of me is the illusion, and reality invisible,

How success can be tasted when I’m drowning in the ocean of failure,

How a ray can be produced from the darkness itself,

Somewhere down the memory lane, I can still hear those voices,

Calling me, to come back and complete my journey I’m destined for,

They still hold the faith, that life is a magic wand and I’m the magician.

It’s been long time since I have been to my destined path,

But the wand is still in my hands,

It doesn’t work now as I’m not a magician anymore,

Life seems to be now simpler, dull and numb,

Things are perceived the way they are seemed,

Illusion is now the reality, the reason to survive.



Getting involved in this world is not tough, but,

Somewhere down the memory lane I can still hear those voices,

Calling out my name, telling me to have faith,

Trying to save me from the sorrow and pain,

Telling me that life is a magic wand and I’m the magician!!

Blindness

Intense are the senses, which never found their way home,

But now they are the gift of blindness, to save me from the dark,

As I lose one , other comes to fill the void!!


Everyone asks me, ‘Do you miss the sunshine, which used to air the fire burning inside you, uplift your spirits when everything seems to be falling apart. Do you miss the sunshine which painted you with gold so that you can stand high and shine with glory? Do you miss your sunshine?’ They went deaf when I started speaking, speaking about that light I meet every day, speaking about that ray which fans my dying embers, speaking about everything I remember about my sunshine.

Now remembering it is more difficult as the days passes. It has become a dull memory, no matter how much I try to hold it coz it’s the last thing left I remember from my vision, the reason of still being alive. They come and go, holding my hands, giving me sympathy, but no one can hear my cries, my tears which are hidden in the soft, cheerful voice which always wipes their tears telling them that

If One Goes The Others Come To Fill The Void !

A TOAST

Give me a toast, a toast of life,
Life which is not empty,
Empty of love and pain!!
Pain is a tranquilizer. It makes me stable and tells me not be so happy coz nothing stays forever.
Love is a wind which blows like a storm and sometimes like a breeze telling me that I'm not the slave of money but of love  no matter how much i deny it.
Sometimes things seems to be so clear to get, paths become vivid, emotions so intense that every muscle gets ready for it but suddenly the wind stops and what is left is a DESERT WITH A DREAM OF RAIN. The coldness of blues freezes every muscle of yours, numbs your senses and the paths once so vivid are covered with a dense mist. Everything freezes and you have nothing left except a prayer, the hope , that spring will follow winters. Everyday is like lying in your death bed, constantly praying for the sunshine, the warmth.
You don't lose hope and surviving the torture of blues, you still wait to see that ray coming for you and every day you die thousand times with a hope of reliving those vivid paths, those intense emotions, GETTING READY FOR LIFE!! 

Is that u..

How many times u hav gone through this feeling of being numb for a while, want to go into deep slumber from which u never come back, fall from d sky n never reach d ground. How many times the feeling of ripping urself, tearing urself apart has been d way of taking out ur anger, ur tears, ur cries which no one can see nor hear. How many times d fall has brought the blue in ur life without the pain but with the numbness which is more deadly than the pain.
In this life we all sail in the same boat which stops temporarily at many checkpoints but has one last stop-'Death'. We all starts life as a baby and die as a old person.
'Baby' signifies innocence, faith, elegance, curiousity, n love. The 'Old person' signifies wisdom, thoughfulness, charm, flame, n baby who want to relive from the very start. The urge to relive the past as a kid as a small innocent baby comes from the struggles we face in life, the responsibilities we want to break from, the rules written in the books which we want to break free. Its all the urge to live our life which push us more towards our past as a child who is carefree. The fire which burns in every heart to live life is the fire which can enlighten our future or burn it.
The feeling of numbness or blue comes to those who want to live their life , who have the burning desire to live before they die. Living life is not as simple as sayin it. It require greater level of courage n frequent struggles. this is so because at evey step society n its followers r ready with the books to teach us how to live life which i call as living like another puppet.
We all go through this puppet phase n when we realize that we are not what we are acting, the life full of struggles start from that point and life becomes beautiful coz we try to know our orginal identity which no one can tell except life itself. From that point LIFE IS A WAND IN THE HANDS OF A MAGICIAN.

     I won't tell u to believe my words but i would rather tell u to believe it until u realize it!!